“My grandmother cooked for us, her flavors are unique how could I say no?”
“My husband made me a very special meal, how could I not eat it? ”
“My mother in law invited us over, it’s a shame to leave food on her plates”
“My wife’s boss invited us to a celebration there’s no way I can say no thanks, they’ll think I didn’t like their food”
These are just 4 of the many expressions that we hear every day in our counseling. If one thing is certain is that we are culturally driven to eat for others and not for ourselves. The famous expression of “what will they say” or the very traditional punishment we received when we where kids because “you can’t leave food on your plate” are two cultural conditions that are now a days passing a health bill into our lives.
Eating for shame of saying no, or because others might feel offended, should never be a reason for overeating and even gaining weight. Leaving our will and decision-making in the hands of others is not the best option, for surely we will be over eating again and again. Learning to say NO is a process, not something that happens overnight, but if anything is certain is that when we learned to say no, we understand that it is something that we must apply in all aspects of our lives. To relationship that hurt us, to overworking, to the sleepless nights, to people who contaminate us with negative energy and to those who unconsciously makes us overeat without ever having a bad intention.
In fact our culture is given to think that the more we eat the more nourished we are, moms and grandmothers raise us with the thought that through food love is shown, and that I do not refute, actually it shows all love and affection you can have for the one you are cooking, but too much food does the opposite.
Learning to say “no thanks ” will bring more wellness into your life, than really guilt. Slowly you will teach those who surround you, that you eat accordingly to you body’s needs, not to please others. You will show them that you know your body very well and that sometimes not eat everything that’s on your plate is a sign of wisdom, not of self- punishment.
“Half of the troubles of this life can be traced to saying yes too quickly and not saying no soon enough.” ~Josh Billings
So next time you go out to eat, or you have an invitation or someone cooks for yourself, remember that eating just half or leave something on the plate that your body does not need is perfectly fine, in fact it’s very fine, and your body will thank you for it. Do not leave your health to others health, only you know what and how much is good for you.
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